Spring Break: Kristyn

Recently I was asked what I was most excited about doing with Kristyn when she came to visit. My response was easy. "Just be with her." Some people are like that. It doesn't matter where you go or what you do. Those things are great (and yes, we've done some amazingly fun things together)... but the best things, and the best time is that when I am just in her company. I like who I am. I like that I'm completely me. I talk a mile a minute, I laugh at ridiculous things, I can cry one second and then break out into Lady Gaga the next. She has introduced me to a television show in which I sob for 60 minutes straight. We can sit and play hours of Mario Bros. She snuggles with Gracie like they have been together since the beginning. I like the sound of my voice, and I love that she truly hears me.

I am often asked about my family, and how many sisters I have. I always and without hesitation consider and count her. She's a treasure. Family seems too small a word to label, and sister sometimes feels generic. But that is what she has become. My sisters love and have embraced her. I love reading how they will comment on each other's Facebook status updates, and I am filled with gratitude on how intimately precious my world is once those I love, know and love each other too!

During her visit here during Spring Break we were talking about some very large and big life plans, dreams, hopes, realities, and truths (she is about to graduate college in one month!) We talked about people who mind and how they don't matter. Everyone is always going to have a voice, opinion, and point of view. I shared with her that the one that she needs to remember to cultivate and listen to is her own. In the midst of this very profound and intimate conversation she looks at me and said that was true, people who mind don't matter, but that I always would.

In life sometimes the best thing we can offer someone is the freedom to pursue their dreams, and with a kite string we lovingly remind them how to come home. To themselves. To what matters. To the truth.

This very special sister whom I've not known since childhood, but will know a lifetime...

I'm thankful to be included in your story, your journey, your mission, your future.

Your heart, your passion, your integrity, your spirit, and your sisterhood will always matter to me. Regardless of where it takes you or who you become. You will always have a home here, even if here changes. The invitation remains. Always. You are loved.

Sister! This postcard is way overdue- sorry! Thank you so much for a great Spring Break! It means so much to me to know I have a home in Virginia. You have had such a huge impact on my life in this past year and have changed me in so many ways. I hope that one day I can impact someone the way you have for me. You will always matter to me. May can't come soon enough...we will have so much fun! Thank you so much for being you.

So much Love,

Kristyn (AKA: K$ Sister)

Family of Ducks

If it looks like a duck, quacks like a duck, then its a duck... right?

I have been thinking so much about sisterhood recently- its such a bond that runs so intimately deep between women in friendship and love. Then I've also thinking about how my brother loves Matt I think as much as I do, and how because of which it seems seamless to think of Matty and Bill in the same train of thought (the conversation I had with Bill tonight about The Decemberists proves this point true).

I saw Jessica, Kristyn, and Mandy last week. Courtney, Krystal, were missing from a full on reunion. But more then them, it was missing Jules, and Emily- two women that I have loved dearly in pursuit of Christ and truth, for years. I trust them with my entire heart. The good parts, the bad parts, the parts I don't know, the parts that I know well, the parts that lie and hide, and the parts that are bold and honest.

I have known family to take several shapes, forms, dysfunctions, and strengths. When I think of mine, I always think of those women. always. And I think of course... Matty. And not because the length of time I have known them, but because of the depth we are known to each other. They are active in my everyday, in big and small ways. They never let me get too far into distraction before calling me back to conversation and vulnerability. They know how to love me without asking, and they know sometimes just asking what I need means that the first step is to sit quietly waiting for the answer. We sometimes fight and argue. Our feelings get hurt and we sometimes cry. But... we laugh... and even in the silences there is an echoing of love, laughter, and light.

We are ducks.

Sometimes I lead in some grand idea or trip (Vegas baby!).

And sometimes I follow their very wise direction.

I am brought to earth by their stability and loyalty.

And my heart is made free by their encouragement to pursue my dreams.

My kids will know them.

And because of that, my kids will also know a whole different side of me.

... which makes me one very lucky duck.

Who is in your family of ducks?

Do they know how much you love them?

What are you waiting for?

Tell them! Send them a postcard!! (I did this week!)

I have been blessed with friends that have become Family. We stick together in good times and in bad. Hardships and celebrations. Laughter and tears. I would not trade a single thing. The road led me to them. We talk like Family- love like Family- argue like Family- are committed like Family. We are ducks. My life is complete with them. I just celebrated Dad's birthday and loved how 2 sisters not related by blood texted me to ask about the celebration and time with Family. Who is in your big family? Who brings you in- and draws you out of yourself? Do they know it? I pray my sisters (all of them) and brothers (all of them) know each day! Love you!

Elephant Ride: March 23

Self.

Sometimes its hard in the midst of adventure to take a moment and pause.

Sometimes its hard in the midst of someone you love to remain still.

Recently I have opened up about stories, relationships, sights seen, food tasted, hurts felt, and dreams realized.

I have been sharing not just the present but the past too.

Good things.

Hard things.

Real things.

I have been struck by the race- the sprint of life.

And how thankfully- remarkably- the mentality has shifted since China last year.

Yet still I am hearing what I share and I am remembering big things.

Huge things.

They range in emotional significance- and sometimes they hurt.

Sometimes they make me smile.

Sometimes I am left more grateful for the journey.

Sometimes they blow my mind.

Like remembering- an elephant ride on Christmas day in Thailand. Crazy!

Savor.

Remember.

Share.

It's Magical.

More Alive: March 21

I feel more alive when the weather is warmer. Its not just the feel of the sun on my face. It's the rebirth of the earth in the mtns. Trees begin their introduction to Spring and if you squint I am sure you can see it happening right in front of you. Easter is one of my most beloved Holidays in the year. Emily and I used to always spend them together, and this year we aren't. Though I will see her 2 weeks after. I can best explain my love for Easter by saying- I am in so many ways unable to fully understand God's Grace and Sacrifice for me. I am humbled by the Gift given on the crucifix0 and in my OCD and perfectionism and all that I try so hard to control- I see the cross and I instantly remember the truth. And then... I sense myself come alive. All the pressure to be something or everything to everyone dissipates and I am made authentic. A daughter of the King. No one else. Warmer weather brings bright wardrobe colors- flip flops- and rain jackets. Spring Showers that saturate the earth and bring it to life. Easter brings 40 days of Lent that allow us to focus on being without that which stands in our way of knowing Christ. The removal allows the more dense and hard to work soul to be available to water, nourishment, and the time with sacrificial and miraculous love. So yes. I feel more alive and made more me... in this season. Thankful for it- the sun- and the rain.

Love.Love.

me.

march 12-19

picture courtesy of IKEA
Recap.

-JJ and I had a solo Sangria night. It was a welcomed change of pace.

-Came home to Jessica and Kristyn Sunday evening. We made dinner- and had Sarah, Drew, and Ryan over for it. We stayed up so late after it- tears. Truth. Encouragement.

-Monday water issue- showered @ Matty's, went bowling- dinner @ Cheddars... gunman drama at Valley View. I was anxious and uncomfortable. Kristyn simply says that she would throw herself in front of me for a bullet. I might have cried a little bit. Stay up super late again. Great conversation.

-Had lunch with Mandy. Came home snuggled on the couch while watching Clue during a rain storm. "Flames.Breathing Flames"...

-most profound conversation I have ever had.

-Leaving Kristyn in H'burg after Kalan met us. Umm... yeah I cried. I just couldn't let her go. Sisters. Always. I turned back and said that and pinkie swear. My heart wanted to burst. Drove home and heard 'You are Loved'. Took on a whole new meaning. Tears streaming. Grateful for her.

-dream team @ work Friday night.

-Saturday short day PTL! Met Ryan for dinner and saw Rango in town. Love small town nights. Love.Love.Them. And great dinner conversation too.

All good stuff!

Radio:

-I still do not like the song "Smooth" from 1999. I want it finally off the radio.

-I heart Josh Groban still. Found the new CD in the glove box. Still.Love.It. Even though its kind of sad. I don't care.

-Fastball's The Way has been on the radio a ton? Weird? Random? Yes.

-Shuffle is not my friend. Not at all. I broke up with it this week.

xoxox Kar

Lucy & Ethel: Jessica

I don't know how to explain her. Words just don't seem to do justice.

She and I met the summer of 2003 at Rockbridge. We both picked bottom bunks across from each other. My first impression was, "who is this girl? and where can I get her accent?". She laughed at nearly everything I said, and she was full of LIFE. Our friendship was instant.

Through the years we've had numerous visits between us and we've continued laughing. However, there is a richness to the time we spend and a kinship that I would never trade.

Her strength is deep, it runs along the lines of her enormous heart and spirit.

Her faith is real its been tried and tested... but its tenderly remained.

Her heart is HUGE, it's been weathered and celebrated.

She's the voice that reminds me that I can do anything. Anything. Absolutely... anything.

She's my biggest fan, and has been quietly supportive of my choices regardless of her lack of understanding them! When I traveled, she was the FIRST to comment on every album documenting every journey around the world.

This past week she was here at the house for a quick trip. We talked about the future, we talked our weddings (working in Bridal will do this to a girl, weddings are always on the forefront of conversation). She was talking about mine, and said that she was probably going to be crying the whole time. I asked why, and she just said, "you are one of those people, that I will just cry". I didn't quite understand what that meant really, but at the same time I knew completely. Her heart has been with me since we've met. She's championed every success, and she's wanted so much more then what I often settle for. I'd like to think, and I aspire to- do that same thing for her.

Her name is Jessica. She has a dog named Duchess, and a cat named Hope. They are her children. Her nephew Bryce calls her Bessie, which CRACKS ME UP. Her family is the most important thing in her life. She is amazingly talented and will make my wedding cake one day.

When I'm with her, I talk like her. It makes Kristyn laugh, but its so natural.

When I'm with her, I'm reminded again how I scored in having her to share this crazy life with.

When I'm with her, I pray for the man that will capture her heart and protect her for a lifetime.

When I'm with her, I hope she knows that she's worth it.

Her FB page for Pink Sugar

Lucy- "I have a plan"

Ethel- "I'm still recovering from your last plan."

You are like my Ethel. Thanks for always being there.

Jessica

Cat Tobin: August 2003

With all the turmoil and devastation happening in Japan, I have found myself thinking about Cat Tobin, now Cat Carter a lot. She and her husband with their son are about to move to Japan to serve and minister. This has been in the works for years... they have faithfully been patient as they've raised support for their mission. I have always said to Cat, "you know I will visit you in Japan." and I know, that she completely believes me. One day we will hang out in Japan! Crazy!

There are many things that I love about Cat. I admire her passion, her knowledge, her desire to seek the lost and bring them the truth... she's just an amazing woman and I'm so thankful that we got to share a Summer Staff kitchen experience together in 2003, and have known each other since. She's one special lady!

Please pray for this family as they venture across the world to love a culture of people whom do not understand their value, or purpose in Christ... and in the midst of all of the destruction in their Country- that they would be able to see Hope, Peace, and Grace in those that are there to love and serve them.

Kari=

Okay I am the bad kitchen mate because I have been meaning to write, but haven't. I am excited you are there while my friend Libby is there. She is my very bestest friend. So I like others to meet her. I am praying for you and love to get your emails. I am in Phoenix now, but head off to Florida on the 12th. Much love and keep it real,

CAT TOBIN

Col 3:17 YOU ROCK!

Monday will be Sunday

Today is Sunday.

It's been a very full, warm, wonderful day.

Postcard for today will come tomorrow.

You understand.

love.love.

me

Seek.

to listen, its half way down the page... Seek: Crossroads


seek

it's like a secret

silent and still unnamed

under the surface

riddles left unexplained

running in circles I can't find my way

so where do I go?

with this hunger- runs deeper than I can explain

these questions- they burn like a fire in brain

what am i looking for this time?

if i seek what will i find?

(what will i find...)

a greater purpose

just for this empty heart

give me direction- and tell me where to start

i'll take your word if you are speaking

so where do i go... what will i find.

what will i find. what will i find.

what will i find. what will i find.

so where do i go with this hunger

that runs deeper than i can explain.

if i seek what will i find?

-crossroads music

3.11.11

A perfect Sunday.

Church. Dunkin Donuts. Phone date with Mandy. Joyful Spirit. Painted my nails red. Ryan driving to the movies. Flip Flops in the rain. Ice Cream with Peanut Butter sauce. Great conversation. Rain into snow. Home by 9pm and asleep before 10:30pm. Closing shift Monday with the "Dream Team".

-"I'm not superficial but I think Velcro shoes are funny.... yeah... Tie your shoes." (endless laughter)

-Favorite thought provoking quotes this week:

"Forgiveness if giving up the Hope that the past could have been any different."

-"I don't want to compare myself to other Christians, I want to compare myself to Christ."

Loving quiet moments in the midst of chaos. Text conversations with JJ. Knowing better than A. about almost everything. Obsessed with the song "Seek" --> will get its own postcard. Thursday so lazy and wonderful. The rain. Spent time writing. Lent Begins. Talking to Sarah and Ryan long after House Dinner has ended. Waking up easier. Anticipating the arrival of Jessica and Kristyn. AAH! So excited. Mandy next week too. Feeling scattered and focused @ same time. Spring is upon us. Each day is New. Kar... pause to enjoy it all.

Love.Love.

Me

Michigan Spring Break: Matt, Miles, Justin & Jackson

Matty went on a Spring Break trip to Michigan with his boys Justin and Jackson. They got to see Miles, Smusz, and the Sharps. Michigan might seem like an unlikely choice for Spring Break, but they chose friendship. And while I have not met Justin and Jackson, I appreciate their contribution to this project!

(Miles and Em, I miss you both! Hope you are well!)

Kur,

Checked out Lake Michigan this morning then walked around down town Traverse City. Drank some local beer, always a winner.

KARI!!! you rock so much & I'm glad we are friends enjoy the post card from the great north.

Michigan is so cold and snowy for a spring break.

Kur, you rock so much & I'm glad we are friends. Enjoy the post card from the great north.

This was a joint card from Matty, Miles, Justin & Jackson.

Sierra Leone: Seth

Before my friend Seth left for his journey to Sierra Leone, he made me a funny postcard. I got it today. He left to work with Mercy Ships, and he will be gone a long time. Thankfully, we've never lived in the same place and are great at email and Facebook banter, so I will pretend that Africa is really PA, and his visits to Lexington will be a little bit more spread out.

There are many reasons why I like Seth. However, one thing that strikes me is that Seth and I met really late in the Lexington Social Scene game. He's interned at camp, and we've run in the similar social circle here. But after this last summer season he stayed around a bit, and we hung out a lot more. I tried to talk him into moving here, it didn't work. But he did come to visit a bunch and before he left last week he came down to Lexington and the text was "surprise I'm in VA", which my response was, "surprise I'm working all weekend." Thankfully we did meet up at 9pm for a visit and conversation. I like that we are good enough friends I can email him and ask him why he's single, because I think he's a great catch. And that he can email me asking me for an outrageous amount of frequent flier miles so he can upgrade his Africa plane ticket. I like that he will email a response to a Facebook comment instead of posting, or that he'll text back within minutes-- he's so quick! I like his book taste, and I plan on reading a couple he's talked about. I like that we can chat, but we can also talk- really talk about things that matter too. I like that he didn't let Drew or Matt tell me about Africa, but felt it was important to tell me himself. I like that he makes me laugh, a lot- and that he sends Christmas Cards.

My favorite thing about Seth is that he commands ease because he is easy to be around. I think that this will come in handy while living in a Foreign Country doing Ministry Outreach. I think that his spirit will beckon joy and calm in situations that instigate hostility and disorder. I'm pumped he is serving in Africa, even though I worry.

I'm thankful to know and understand travel and international adventures enough from my experience to appreciate the connection to home and how to communicate back to those we love. I am also thankful that Seth too understands the importance of including us in on his journey, for as his life and mission there is to serve, the ripple effect is huge. God will use this time in HUGE ways. It will touch us all here at home, and it will change those who are able to follow the story. Seth may be the one in Africa, thankfully due to modern technology- we are all in this together (hey High School Musical), and in prayer, friendship, emails, and letters- we are all used in the story and mission.

You can follow his blog here: Now I Can See

Thanks for the very fun and creative postcard. It made me confused at first, but then yes... I flipped it over and saw it was from you and it made complete sense. I will write, I promise. You are missed, loved, and prayed for! Africa... is just as close as PA... right?

3-2-11

Kari,

Consider this your formal invite to Sierra Leone! Also, I just (SPOILER ALERT!) really wanted to get on your blog! I'm sorry that my trip may hinder our growing friendship, but I hope you can look past that. Take care, have fun fooventures & keep being awesome. Obviously, I miss yah (so cliche).

Seth

People: Favorite Things

grapes courtesy of IKEA.


Current Favorite Things About People: It became one very long list... :O)

People who are not afraid of living life.

Not afraid of loving. Laughing. Crying.

Jumping. Falling. Getting dirty or caught in the rain.

People who live and breathe with authenticty and command you to do the same.

People who will eat French Fries but know they shouldn't.

People who are artists in their core- and their lives are an expression of their own interpretation.

People who don't just read blogs,

but have a life worth documenting on one.

People who also believe that Trailers are the best part of going to a movie and that life would not be complete without chocolate.

People who push you- Hard. And never leave you alone in silence.

Love worth moving for.

People that give you the last piece of gum in their pack.

Will bring you coffee just because.

People who hate holding hands- but still hold yours because you love it.

People who make you laugh into tears and smile after screams.

I know people like this. I love them.

Lime: March 6

picture courtesy of IKEA art department...

March 6, 2011

1) This picture inspires me to hum "put a lime in the coconut" and then consequently daydream about the ocean...

2) For the past 2 Monday's Jessica and I have had girlfriend dates. We've done mani/pedi's, Mimosa's in the middle of the afternoon, Mall shopping, and dinners at Ichiban. We laugh a lot and tells stories. We call them dates- and last week she said she'd move to be with me- and she's married to a great guy, which just makes me laugh.

3) I got two new pairs of shoes and wore them to work on Saturday. They were amazing.

4) I cut my hair and got bangs. The group reaction: love them. They are sassy and I appreciate a new look as I continue to grow my hair out.

5) Felt for the first time in a long time Saturday night the difference between a Hug, and the intimacy in being Held. It took me by surprise and lasted way longer than I expected. But... it was comfortable and I was vulnerable in a refreshing way. It was changing. We both noticed it and commented on it, which was just funny.

6) It's March. Where did January and Feb go?

Love.Love.

Me

Sweets for the Sweet May 2000: Barb

I have countless letters, cards, and pieces of encouragement with this beloved woman's handwriting on it. I recognize it instantly, and at once I am made peaceful and content in the way she has pursued my heart to know Jesus better since I was 3 years old. She has impacted so many people over the years, and I always delight when I connect another dot in the myriad group of people we know and love. This happened often when I was on YL Staff at Rockbridge.

It's been awhile since we have been able to sit down and talk about what we are learning in life, our families, struggles, and triumphs. I miss her. But her messages are tucked away in cute boxes full of prized letters, and in the hunt for today's Sunday Sentimental offering I found one covered in Hershey Kisses, and knew before flipping it over what the message said. The woman who sent it has been a treasured friend/mentor/counselor/sister, and of course and most tenderly: a mother figure in my life. I love her, and today this message seemed particularly fitting (as always) about the paths and journeys of life, and how in the midst of all that we do not know, can not control, and do not understand- leaning on Christ with all we can, be, and do in acknowledging his power and sovereignty our paths will be made straight. This reminder never gets old. I am thankful for such an amazing woman to remind me in postcards, letters, and lunches over her famous chicken salad that Jesus is forever. His promises are good and real. And that along the road, she is also there encouraging me to stay on the course in confidence that the Lord is at work, and His work is always good.

I also love that for 27 years of my life, she has called me Kari Berri. It's familiar, maternal, and I love it. Love love love it.

"sweets for the sweet"! 5-31-00

Dearest Kari Berri: Just a thought after our great chat... "Trust in the Lord with all your heart- lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight."!! That little Proverb always helps us keep on track! A far as "forever" goes- "Being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion." Forever. Little step by little step!! Love, Barbara Gillan

Feb Postcard Pen Pal Recap

1) Hits: 446!! Total is over a thousand!

2) Guest Contributors: 7!

Matty wins the award for two.

Ashley for furthest traveled card.

Sarah's for perfect timing.

Jeni for Disney and sentimental reminder. Paris!

Katie for oldest friend... ERMS!

Sandy for reminding me each day I am loved. And making sure I always know it.

3) Favorite Self: Jan 30-Feb 5 Recap (and green door)

4) Favorite Sentimental Sunday: A tie between Seattle & Paris

5) Remembering that each day is an adventure. Loving the process to document it all.

Love.Love.

Me

Feb: Catching Up and Wrapping It Up

Catching up Feb... and wrapping it up.

1) Feeling the push to consider a new direction and life- that I did not see myself pursuing. Pretty excited. And terrified.

2) I was walked to my car on Saturday night and was spoken truth to by someone I never expected. There were moments I honestly knew so completely that the Lord was there. He was bold. He was vulnerable. He saw me. The true me. And without pretense or manipulation shared his heart. It was familiar. But entirely different. Then Matty saved the day when i ran out of gas. I know some great men. They pursue me. Challenge me, and allow me the opportunity to share Me. Just as I am today. Its authentic and its joyful.

3) Jessica- my work BFF is not just a work friend anymore. I love love love her.

4) I am still working towards letting go of my view of the future to embrace where the Lord has me.

5) I am quiet more in the car then ever. And love it.

6) I miss my sisters. All of them.

7) I loved W. well- and because I know and love JC I trust that the seeds planted will grow into something beautiful in her. In me? An endless field of sunflowers.

Life is so so good. And JC... the best.

Safe.Home.

I have always thought this picture spoke "knock and the door shall be opened." Recently however in light of some major things learned, I have looked at it more with the thoughts of how safe and loved we are behind the door. The feeling of being safe at home. How home isn't just where you lay your head, or store your things. How home has become so much of how I feel with the Lord, regardless of my physical location. How safe, protected and loved I have felt there... and thankfully also here. For myself and for others.

By all definintions and classifications I opened up my home to a stranger- barely a friend- on Saturday night. A girl I work with needed help. The Lord placed me in the situation with objectivity, support, and wisdom. I did not feel adequate or prepared. But the Lord knew. He equips us as we need it- and somehow it worked out. I admit I struggle with wanting to fix things- everything. However I have been learning so much about how by trusting God to use us- we are more effective because our ego and heart know its not us at all. The pressure to be perfect subsides- and our hearts are transformed forever. The lessons learned that night by sharing this home and beign a friends are continuing to be revealed. This house has been such a huge blessing to me and others. I think I have often taken for granted how safe I feel here. Secure. Protected. In the anxiety of making those things vulnerable I was able to appreciate how the Lord asks us to trust, rely, and rest only in His provision and protection. My life is not my own. My experiences are not limited to me. All glory to the Father. Let my life be a reflections of His mercies. His love. His redemption. His love! Saturday night I gave every minute over to Him in control and provision. My ability to love someone I barely know, to understand the gravity of that choice and escape... to open my door, invite her in. To share my journey and my understanding of hope. Freedom. Grace. I found myself so incredibly changed by loving and helping someone in such a difficult place- that I can only bow in awe to the Father- whom is always safe.

Radio Encouragement

Jesus in the Radio ---> A week of goodness & encouragement

"Living. He loved me.

Dying. He saved me.

Buried. He carried my sins far away.

Rising. He justified freely forever.

One day He's coming. Oh Glorious Day" --Casting Crowns, Glorious Day

Everyday I have heard "Your Love" on the radio. I have heard it on secular & Christian stations. Its been crazy. No lie. Sometimes even twice a day! I listen each time & I SING!

"So I climbed a mountain and I built an altar... Looked out as far as I could see- and everyday I'm getting older, I'm running out of dreams. But your Love. Your love- the only thing that matters is your love. Your love is all I have to give. Your love is enough to light up the darkness- its your love. All I ever needed was your life. You're the hope in the morning- you're the light when the night is falling. You're the song when my heart is singing, its your love..."

Then of course Stay. Firework for Jessica- always makes me giggle. Lots of Train- all the time! Yay for the Grammy win. Love is Here... Mighty to Save. Your love O Lord. Sometimes the radio drive me crazy or just annoys me so I turn it off. But its been a great blessing this week as I have prayed about the future and this next LEAP of faith in this adventure.